Monday, May 12, 2014

Consultation Day!

Phew, we made it to consultation day! I was happy to have been as busy as I was the past few weeks, because it sure made the time go by quickly. And the little pangs of nervousness and butterflies I felt over the weekend were very few and short-lived because my group performed at a renaissance faire over the weekend, so the two days leading up to today were full of six performances and all the other stuff that goes with it, and I didn't have time to dwell.

And then suddenly it was consultation day!

The Appointment

Our appointment was rescheduled over the weekend for a half hour later because my doctor had a surgery to do, and then we waited a little longer still, but that was OK. I felt super antsy in the waiting room and was trying to keep myself from bouncing all over the place.

When it was my turn, I was weighed and measured and told them the first day of my last period and whether I had any allergies to medications or latex. Then we were ushered into Dr. B's office for a chat.

It really ended up feeling like a very quick talk with the doctor. He had me give him an overview of our attempts to conceive, and noted the uterine fibroids that my last doctor had mentioned, and agreed with me that it was not the best idea to transfer all four of my remaining blastocysts and then selectively reduce, like the last doctor recommended. (He said I could have lost the entire pregnancy from attempting to reduce.) He said he recommended having the blastocysts sent to his clinic from OHSU, and they would transfer them at ORM.

That last bit completely surprised me. I distinctly remember asking ORM whether I could have blasts from another clinic transferred by ORM, and they said no, because they couldn't guarantee the quality of the procedure. So either I misheard back then or they changed their rules. I did tell Dr. B I'd heard it wasn't possible to do that, and he said "well, the embryologists don't like it because they can't guarantee the quality, but I don't think that's a reason not to try." My blastocysts are not rated very well (I think three of them are 3bb and he likes to see 5-day blasts at a 5a - it makes sense though, as the best ones were already used) but the doctor thinks we should take advantage of all the work and money and try the cheaper option of a Frozen Embryo Transfer first, and if it doesn't work we can move onto a fresh cycle of IVF.

He also gave us a quick overview of what he thinks the protocol should be. It's a 7-week protocol, with 2-4 weeks of birth control first, and then estrogen shots and progesterone-in-oil. They'll also do a mock transfer, a sonohysterogram, a doppler ultrasound and some blood tests. Most of those are things I've done before and am not worried about, but the sonohysterogram is kind of a mixed-bag as far as what other people have experienced and so that makes me a teensy bit nervous. They will fill my uterus with saline and then check for polyps or fibroids or any other weirdnesses. It should be pretty straightforward but we shall see. I'm definitely interested in a second opinion about those fibroids that the last doc found.

When we were finished with Dr. B, I had some blood drawn to check my thyroid and vitamin D levels (they called before we got home to tell me both were fine), and also to send some off to Counsyl for carrier screening. (If I do carry anything, then Cory will also be tested and that will help us determine if we should be concerned about our children having any genetic diseases.)

Next, we spoke with the head nurse who will be handling my protocol. She will be sending me a detailed schedule of the protocol soon, but in the meantime she gave us both some lab orders (we've already done all the blood tests she ordered but it was three years ago and their limit is two) and a prescription for birth control so I can be ready when the time comes.

And the time will come in early June. I'm thinking probably June 2 will be the first day of my next cycle, and then I'll call the clinic and we will get this show on the road.

My Initial Reaction

I thought I would be more excited. I'm not excited at all. I don't know if it's because I'm still trying to protect myself from disappointment, or because I don't trust that the blastocysts are going to be viable, or because I've been thinking that I was going straight into a fresh-cycle IVF for three years now and my plan has been turned on its head. I don't know what it is. I called Mom once I was home from work and she told me I don't have to be excited about it, which felt good to hear, but I still kind of feel like something's wrong with me if I can't be daydreaming about pregnancy and babies like I think I should be. Or overwhelmed with gratitude or restlessness or SOMETHING. I don't know, maybe I just need a little more time to let it sink in. Or maybe it won't sink in until I start estrogen injections again...

So now we hurry up and wait again. At least this time it'll only be about three weeks (one of which will be eaten up by our trip to Chicago - we fly out this weekend) and then the movement we make will be like a bullet train. Thank goodness for that.

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