Thursday, January 6, 2011


My doctor called me yesterday morning during work to follow up on the lab work from December 22nd. She reiterated what the nurse had told me about my levels; she said she'd like to see my progesterone at a 10 but my blood was taken a day or two earlier in my luteal phase than we'd planned so she wasn't especially worried.

Then I asked about C, even though I kind of half thought that she wouldn't be able to tell me any details, but she wasn't nearly as closed-lipped as the nurse last week. "It isn't good," she said. "Normal sperm count is 20-100 million, he is at 20.5 million. There was no motility, it was immotile. And the morphology was 1%." She went on to say that the issues could always be due to illness, and that he'd get tested again, etc.

I called Mom and cried. All my what-ifs and it's-not-fairs came flying at me at the same time, and I had to hide on the patio so none of my coworkers would stumble across me. I felt better after the news had a chance to sink in; I'm relatively quick to buck up but apparently I have to let go of it first.

C has an appointment with the urologist a week from today. Hopefully the options are easier, less invasive and cheaper than I think they're going to be. We can rise to meet whatever comes, but because I like to over-think I get worried when I don't know what our options are. Now to keep myself distracted for a week.

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